Rock on the Range... By the numbers and with photo goodness.

Wow... What a day.

Number of vomiting patients I had: 8.

Number of times I was actually vomited on: 1/2. I can't say 1 because the vomit only landed on my pant leg. It wasn't much.

Number of head injuries I teched: 4.

Number of times I was hit on by a woman: 2

Number of times I was hit on by a guy: 11

Number of crowd surfers I caught personally: 2.

Number of crowd surfers I was convinced had a broken neck: countless.

Number of good concerts I saw: 5.

Number of celebrities I met: 1.

Number of times I was sucked up to because I was behind the barrier and someone wanted to get backstage: At least a hundred.

Number of hours of overtime earned: 19.

The day started out calmly enough. I showed up at the station early, sans coffee, which doesn't make for a happy Epi, particularly when it's the butt crack of dawn. I met some awesome folks from my company from other parts of the state. It was... calmly chaotic. Pardon the blurry pics... they're all from my phone.

The relative calm before the storm.

We caravaned (apparently that actually *is* a word) over to the stadium in company trucks. All loaded up with extra monitors, drug bags, airway bags and five times the amount of narcan we normally carry. I wish I had a shot of the seven of us loaded up in the back of the squad. Unfortunately I was too busy wishing I had just gotten that coffee before going to the station.

Once at the stadium we were assigned our partners for the day and assigned our backpacks and initial locations. We headed out.

Our initial location. Complete with an empty venue.

The first couple of hours lasted forever. At the very least we had seats to sit in. I can assure you there is NOTHING more boring than staring at the sky (praying it wouldn't rain) and at the empty stadium. Around eleven in the morning they sent us to get lunch from the hospitality tent. "Eat now... the crowd is being let in soon!" They told us. So we ate.

Then... the crowd was let in.

Once again, taken from my camera phone, excuse me for the dark video. Yes, that's two or three people running.

Once folks started filling in and the first band hit the stage (I was working the main stage at this point, where the more well known bands were playing) things started to pick up.

Well, at least we have people here now.

We (myself and my partner... a Basic from Cinci) got to watch a few acts including Finger Eleven (Who by the way, put on a GREAT show!) before being sent to Stage B. We were told to *expedite*... In other words... "Get your booty to Stage B, Pronto. Immediately if not sooner." We moved.

Stage B, where the lesser known groups were performing was actually more fun to work than the main stage.

Security escorts a crowd surfer back to the crowd.

The stage divers were INSANE. I can't pretend to imagine what possesses someone to trust complete strangers to carry them up on to the stage. We had more head wounds than I have treated over the entire duration of my career (which albeit has not been more than a few years, but still!) It's amazing what beer and drugs can inspire people to do.

At this point triage 1 and triage 2 stopped being referred to as such and started being referred to as "the Vomitorium 1 and 2". Over the radio. Apparently, back on the farm things were not going well.

The view from behind the barrier at Stage B. Not bad, eh? That's a LOT of people.

Stage B was actually a little crazier than the main stage, oddly enough. Apparently the fans of the lesser known bands were *slightly* more aggressive. Here is where the majority of my puking patients and head wounds came into play.

It's also where I met my sole celebrity of the weekend.

Me and Kyle G from Tenacious D. He was awesome :) He even wanted to check my camera to make sure the picture turned out!

Kyle G was there to see Filter. Filter put on an AMAZING show. He got to watch the show while I tended to the numerous head and neck injuries that resulted from the crowd surfing.

Smile for the camera ladies... And no, I can't get you backstage.

And when a video camera is involved... All hell breaks loose. What the hell is it with the video cameras? When this camera guy showed up we saw more boobs, vomiting and head injuries than we ever thought possible. A tossup between heaven and hell for my partner.

My Partner for the Day helping the roadies out with the speakers... Apparently the speakers don't like it when the wind blows. Nor do the Roadies. They were... to put it lightly... Stressed.

Ten hours after we had breakfast they sent us back to the main stage to work. YES! I got to see Disturbed and Stone Temple Pilots. It was their first concert in seven years. AWESOME stuff!

Disturbed... From behind and above the backstage..

The dude in the white shirt is Partner McHottie. And that's his favorite band playing on stage. He told me today he had both nitrile covered fists in the air. His words: "It's good to be McHottie."

The scene when Stone Temple Pilots hit the stage. Absolute chaos.

Disturbed was excellent. Stone Temple Pilots was awesome. And I got to watch them both from my comfy perch up in the stands. We were interrupted a handful of times to actually work (GASP!)... Two drunk females and a bump on the head. One puker. One missing drunk girl. At this point I was so exhausted and dehydrated and sunburned... It's kind of a blur.

And then... it was over.

Thank GOD.

The aftermath. Absolutely disgusting.

The concert floor was covered in vomit, urine, beer and beer bottles. Totally disgusting. We dragged our exhausted butts back to the first aid station (The Vomitorium 1, for those of you still reading) and waited like kids on Christmas morning for the okay to return to the station and head home. It finally came about 1230am. We would have sprinted for the trucks, but we were too tired.

The drive home took forever, and I'm missing large chunks of time where I was driving. Not good. I don't suggest ANYONE EVER drive when you're so tired you can't see straight. Bad bad stuff.

I've come to the conclusion that even if they offered me triple time and flew me down there first class and put me up in a five star hotel I STILL would not do this again. It was an excellent experience. It was fun at times. But I'm getting way too old to do stuff like this to my body :)


EE said...

I am so jealous.

Evil Transport Lady said...


Medic61 said...

Umm, you got to meet Kyle G? I'm sooo insanely jealous. I adore the D!
This looks like a lot of insane fun that was probably intensely gross at some points, but wow! That's crazy, girl! Tell your company that they can send me next time instead ;)