My baby boy was born.
My little man. Eight years ago you were born, and some days it feels like it was yesterday, and others... Well, other days it feels like it was eighty years ago instead of eight.
I carried you for nine long months. It wasn't easy, believe me, but worth every exhausting day. Some days I couldn't even get out of bed. It just goes to show you that even before you were born you were pushing me to do my very best for you. Everything I've done since the day I found out I was going to be blessed with you in my life, I've done for you.
The day you were born I woke up with a horrible cold. I called my doctor and he made room for me to be seen. When I went to his office he didn't recognize me! Apparently my Blood Pressure was so high I didn't even look the same to him. And here I thought it was because I didn't have my makeup on.
You know, I've learned a lot about preeclampsia since I had you, and for both of our sake I'm glad I didn't know then what I know now. The nurses were fussing over me, and I thought it was just because of my sparkling personality! I later on found out it was because I was pretty sick, and they were worried about the both of us.
They stuck me with needles, and gave me some medicine to help convince you that it was time to come into the world. It made me feel absolutely horrible, but despite that, I was still thrilled that I was going to get to meet you soon. Then they gave me some more medicine that made me feel even worse. This was to keep us both safe.
I sat in the hospital and waited for your Daddy to get there. He was out of town at work, and it took him awhile. Your Grandma was there pretty quickly. She left work to be with us. I was so glad to see her. She kept me busy while we waited for you. Your Grandma (All of your Grandparents) they love you so much, sweety. They would walk through fire for you and your Sister. You are so fortunate to have such amazing Grandparents.
I remember watching "The Rock" bake Valentines Day cookies for his wife with Martha Stewart. I know you have no idea who The Rock or Martha Stewart are, I'll tell you some day. You won't be nearly as amused as I was.
It was a long day that was basically comprised of the absolute worst headache I've ever had, coupled with my being scared to death that something would happen to you. Thank goodness for the wonderful Nurse who massaged my head while assuring me that you would be fine.
With the help of several Nurses (who I credit with saving my life and sanity) and the Doctor who brought you (and your Sister) into this world, you were born. You, little man, were now part of our lives, and we would be forever changed.
Because of you, your father and I grew up and found out what it was to put someone else ahead of us. We learned what it was to love someone unconditionally. We became parents of an absolute angel that day.
Since then I have been so blessed to have you in my life. I've learned more from you than you could ever know. I worry about you every day. Everything from whether or not your Dad remembered to have you brush your teeth to how the other kids are treating you. You've taught me about the joy of learning. You've taught me to be curious again. You've taught ME that I can do anything I set my mind to. You've taught me that when something interests me I should learn absolutely everything there is to learn about that subject. I remember when you were four and you were watching Blues Clues, and Steve was using bits and pieces of sign language. You wanted to learn how to sign your name. You were very insistent. Two hours later you could do it.
A year and a half ago I was in Medic school and learning how to read EKG's. You took my book one afternoon and started recreating the EKG strips on loose leaf paper. You wanted to know what each one meant. A month later we did your first Science Fair project. You decided to do it on "If your heart beats faster when you are sitting, standing, or exercising". It's your EKG that is tattoo'd on my ankle (and my heart) forever. It was YOU that inspired me to pursue my dreams of becoming an EMT (and eventually a Medic). It was you. Do you see what an impact you've had on me?
The point of all this...
I just want you to know how much I love you. I want you to know that you can become anything you dream. I want you to know that every minute of every day of my life, from the moment you and your sister were born until the day I die, is spent thinking of you and She Who Rules. I'm wondering what you're thinking, and if you're having a good day, and whether or not the other kids in your class are being nice to you. Every second that I spend freezing my booty off (again, your words) or studying nephrology is for you.
I'm not telling you all of this to make you feel sorry for me. Believe me, my life has done nothing but improve since you came into this world. I'm telling you this (and showing you too, I hope) so that you don't ever have to wonder if I really do love you. I'm telling you all of this so that you know that you are the most important thing in my life.
I'm telling you this because I want you to know that YOU... Yes you, little man, have made me a better person because of who you are. I will walk across a field of broken glass, I will slay dragons and boogie monsters, I will overcome any obstacle that presents itself in my life because of you.
You and your baby sister are my entire life. You are the reason that I wake up in the morning, and the reason that I do what I do over the course of the day. You are the reason that I run myself ragged. You are the reason that I do everything I do.
Happy Birthday, Baby. (Yes, you will always be my Baby, even when you're 105 years old) I love you more than life itself. Thank you for being my inspiration.
Your Mom.
9 comments:
I started crying at the end. I told myself I wouldn't, and then it just happened.
My mom told me there would always be room for me on her lap, even when I had my own kids. (Have you read the book Love You Forever? It's killer)
I hope one day I'm lucky enough to write a letter like that to my own little one.
Happy Birthday to him <3 (and you, for that matter)
Happy Birthday Future Cardiologist!
Wow...That was awesome. Happy birthday, sir.
Happy Birthday to the man
and great post Epi ...
I love posts from the Heart
Wow!
What a wonderful post, showing the love for your little one! Thanks for sharing with us.
And Happy Birthday to him!!!!!!
Karen
OK, not fair. You failed to mention the potential for saline running down my cheeks.
Very well written. I think I need to call my kids just as soon as I possibly can.
Thanks.
Very nice. Happy birthday to the little guy!
Thanks so much to everyone who left a comment. The second and third time I read it I thought of even more things that I wanted to say...
It's amazing the impact these little people can have on us, isn't it?
Thanks again.
Beautiful- absofreakinlutely beautiful!!
Thank you,
John
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